we have celebrated every year on your birthday ,balloons ,cake ,smiles, friends laughter, your 18th ripped us apart all over again family and close friends came round and how it must have been painful for them to see us like that , your 19 we had quietly with more tears and pain, well i decided you wouldn't want that ,,,, so yore 20th i started training lol swimming 3 times a week , i spoke to the pool manager and he would let me have a lane for the day, so we trained set up a just-giving page for make a wish not knowing how it would go , but you know tylor if you dont try you gain nothing , well i was up early i placed your necklace around my neck , had my toast , posted my watch on face book and off we went , Jim marshaled for me i would have wanted no one else doing it he was first class, i was in the pool before he set up the table but i watched as he set up the table, and i swam i saw the sun rise and shine into the pool and i watched and swam time just seemed to pass , i was very aware you were there, i even left your mum a note saying i loved them and i hadn't mentioned you as you had come with me, just like those early morning boot sales or fishing adventures,the hours passed and i swam , we had raised so much money for make a wish but i had been so nervous theirs me i couldn't stand up at school and talk ,hears me center of attention whats more in my trunks, i kept going and people kept coming in and out , time passed and i swam thinking of you all the way,nanny came down at two and the Marcus jenny and we were on the last 2 hours Dionne turned up which made me cry to my self we hadet seen the children in ages in fact the first time we had seen the little Bella ,xxxx you would love her so much xxx little James not so little bless him love him so much, everyone kept coming in and out , uncle Marcus well lol he got in did a few lengths and was nacked so so funny mate it just added to how special it was , which is exactly what i had tryed to do , we raised over £2600 but so much more than that we kept your name alive we had fun in your name and there were smiles all i could of dreamed for, still so much pain but a little special time , like you my Special beautiful boy i love you so much for ever my boy , i miss you so much xxxxxxxx